This Tuesday’s Poem Vol 2

the sunlight changes in October
from the harsh direct overhead light
of August
to something
softer 

and I, too, soften
my eyes soften.

I become aware
there is something inside of me that
has been begging for my softness
all this time
who am I but
the gentlest version of myself 

I’ve been taught an aggression
that I do not agree with
I’ve been taught to
love aggressively
work aggressively
live aggressively

“take life by the horns”
“work hard
play hard
keep partying like it’s your job”
“you can sleep when you’re dead” 

But as I meet this softest part of me
I wish I had seen her sooner
heard her sooner

She wants no part of that aggression 

She wants delight
She wants the light
She wants deliciousness

She wants not to be perceived and praised
for the hardest thing she’s ever done

Not to be a martyr
a survivor
a triumph
but a woman

skin, bones, & softness
look at her as the women she is
not the woman you’ve commanded her to perform to be

She is a woman
the soft light of October
She deserves delight.